Waving good-bye...or hello?

So here we are, facing a whole new year. Everyone seems to be pretty split, like 80/20 bad year/good year. I think the Husband and I fall somewhere in the 20%. We had a lot thrown our way, and both of us have agreed, that while some times were emotionally taxing, we dealt with everything with grace and we did well, as we always do. No doubt, hard times have made the two of us become closer, and we're proud of that. So here's what our 2010 looked like:

First, I lost my job. And while it was tough to be one of the statistics, I decided I was going to embrace it and move forward with the plan that I decided a long time ago: to be running my own successful business by the time I was 35.

I joined a gym for the first time ever. I decided that there's no time like the present to get healthy. And it's working!

I became more active in the Daughter's school by helping design the yearbook and volunteering at BEPO (our version of the PTA) events. The husband and I believe that if we show a genuine interest in the things our kids like, they will take them seriously, too. The Daughter is excited that I get to be a part of these things--something I know will change all too soon, when she's ready to forget she has parents. I get overwhelmed with it, but in reality, I do love doing it. There's such a gratifying feeling when it's all done.

We were able to take our first "vacation" by taking a few days and going down to Easton, PA to the Crayola Factory. What a fantastic trip!

I met some new friends by signing the kidlets up for swimming lessons, and those friends have now become some of our closest friends lately.

We visited Lackey Dam Road. Multiple times. My mother-in-law was laid off this past year, too. So over the summer, we were out with the kidlets quite often, and whenever we seemed to get lost, we were on Lackey Dam Road. So it became the joke of the summer, "Hey kids, Lackey Dam Road!" It was the source of many, many, many laughs.

I became a cheerleading coach and the Cheerleading Commissioner for the Daughter's new league. If you know me, you know cheerleading is something I NEVER did. (I know, the irony!) But since the Daughter is a cheerleader, I decided that if I had to spend so much time at the fields, I was going to find a way to help out. And I did. I volunteered to work with an organization where I knew no one, and it has turned out to honestly be one of the best decisions I have made. I've come away with lots of new friends and an amazing group of people. Coaching is an amazing feeling, especially at the age where they really look up to you. I'm so proud of those girls, and even though I am learning just as they are, I hope they know that they all had just as large or larger of an impact on me as I did for them.

Quite possibly one of the hardest things I had to deal with this year was the decision to put my longtime companion, Teddy, down. I still miss him every day. Teddy had severe bone and muscle deterioration, and our vet thinks he likely developed a bone cancer. But he was 12 and medicine wasn't helping. So without making him suffer, I made the decision to send him to heaven with Klinger, Charles, and Bob. I miss him dearly, but I know in my heart that it was right, that he was in pain.

And then that night, I got to ride in an ambulance for the first time ever. One of my girls was in a stunt, and she "toed down" (when you point your toes down instead of keeping your feet flat), and her spots didn't catch her. I swear we heard her nose crack on the floor. Surprisingly, she didn't break it. Poor thing, I really don't know her well, and she had no one else to ride with her. So I held her hand and tried to comfort her, the best way I knew how. Which was still awkward, and even more so when her mother got there, but that's another story for another day. I needed a stiff drink.

We reworked our mortgage and did some work to our house. Our house was brand new when we bought it four years ago (!). But it's also a half-duplex. The other half looks just like ours. They even painted similar colors. So we've always known that we need to upkeep and do more to get more value out of our house. We put in new wood floors (which I love) and a new back door. We've got more plans for 2011 (tearing down our existing deck to deal with a water problem and rebuild it), but we're happy that we still own a great home.

I was able to rebuild my photography portfolio and start from fresh. (BTW, check me out!) I want to get behind the lens more. It still scares me, I'm way more confident in my design work, but there's something exhilarating about being pushed out of my comfort zone. I'd still like to expand my client base for design, but I'd like to have more balance. More time away from the computer. 

Most of all, we spent the holidays with friends and family. We didn't get to travel to Virginia Beach this year, as that just wasn't in the budget. But we did spend Turkey Day with our new found friends, a family with whom we've had many game nights and amazing campfire discussions. They've become very close to us, and it's a great feeling.

So looking forward, here's our 2011 plan:

The Husband and I are still committed to being healthier. I know, most people say this. But I've seen my body change over the past year. Now, if I could get rid of all this damn chocolate, we'll be on our way. (But we all know I can't be wasteful) The Husband has decided that he wants to be serious about getting healthier, as we're both not getting any younger. So we'll eat better, I'll continue with the gym 3-4 times a week, and we'll go from there.

I'm focusing more on my work here. I need to still build some client base, and that may mean working outside of the home. But we'll see. I've had some great conversations over the past few weeks, and let's just keep our fingers crossed. Also? A very good friend of mine just asked the love of his life to marry him, so I'll be shooting their wedding. Which will hopefully take place this year, but I haven't asked. I figure they're answering enough of those questions, I'll just let them enjoy being engaged. I'm also hoping to build enough of a schedule to keep busy when the Son goes to school in the fall (*tear*). But I want to still have boatloads of fun with the kidlets and find a way to get more work done.

My ultimate goal/resolution? To feel better about myself. I spent the last 2-3 months of 2010 not comfortable. It was an emotionally taxing period. It felt like we tackled everything but the working for myself thing. Which is hard for me, I'm a very career-minded person, but a lot of my freelance tapered off. So it did awful things to my self-esteem. Pair that with falling off the gym horse and the Daughter saying things like "You need to suck it in, mom..." and you have a recipe for disaster. Now, I know she's only seven, and the jeans were a size too small, but paired with the time and place, I needed a pick me up. Note to self: the answer is NOT four Peppermint Mocha martinis.

Of course, I'm still going to bake more and cook more. 2010 was an awesome year for cooking and baking for me, and I'm convinced 2011 will be even better. I've learned some new skills, and paired with an amazing (cheap) produce shop and a garden, this is going to be one Bitchin' Kitchen. 

So here we go. We wave goodbye to 2010, take all the lessons we learned and tuck them away for future use. We say hello to 2011, 'cause we're gonna kick ass this year!

Too girly for my own good?

In a past life--before I was the Mama In Red, I was the college girl in adidas windpants--I used to be a bartender. Which is apparently a job you can never retire from. I highly enjoyed it. It was the perfect job for me at the time. But it made me way more picky about my drinks. I was never a martini gal, and if I was, it was dirty. Please don't bring any frou-frou concoction to me. Don't treat me like a little girl, I can lift a keg forchrisakes.

Fast forward to now. I'm still not a girly drinker. I don't consider Arbor Mist to actually be wine, my red wines aren't chilled, and please don't think I will ever order a cosmopolitan. I'm still set in my ways, I like a Bloody Mary that I can chew, I don't drink anything from the bottom shelf, and I still prefer Jack Daniels to most other liquors. However, I am a margarita girl. That is "my drink." I'm good at making it, and I can suck it down just the same. But then, tonight, I realized I had some PAMA Pomegranite liquor left over. And a bottle of vodka from the Husband's birthday party. So I decided to find from the rubble break out my martini glasses, which until now have only held strained margaritas. And how was it? Delicious. Next up on my list is a chocolate martini. But it may have to wait, I mean I am trying to be healthy and all. Just keep it our secret, kay?

My Oprah List.

So I was hangin' out over at The Stiletto Mom's place, where she's been reading this Oprah nonsense about how O doesn't walk or do stairs. Which I find ironic, seeing how I just now saw a talk show with Bob (her trainer) the other day was saying he tells his clients to hit the stairs of the hotel for exercise. I wonder how she takes the rest of his advice...

Anywho, everyone's been doing this Oprah list on what they don't do. Because we're all about the Mama here, let's get started on the list of things Mama doesn't "do," shall we?

Mama doesn't do wildlife.
Mama doesn't do peas.
Mama doesn't do crummy food.
Mama doesn't dust.
Mama doesn't do tents. Or hippies in tents.
Mama doesn't do Hyundai. Or Kia. Or Toyota, with their recent tales of FAIL. (even though there was a period when I was in love with the 4Runner and some of their trucks. I firmly believe the 22R engine they made is one of the best, but apparently they chose crappy steel to build the frame. And they rot. Nice?)
Mama doesn't do screaming children. Mine or other people's.
Mama doesn't do mornings. Even though the Husband seems to think that after 31 years, I should somehow switch to mornings. (Sorry dear. Not likely to happen.)
Mama doesn't do sugar-free. I'm somewhat embarrassed by the amount of sugar I require in coffee. And don't drink my sweet tea if you don't expect to break your teeth.
Mama doesn't [like to] do yardwork. But I do the gardens, I even scooped today.
Mama doesn't do pink. Magenta? Love.  Bright, bold colors? Can't get enough of them. But pastel pink? Do not like.
Mama doesn't really do icky things. Yes, I have picked up worms, but I don't like to. I was a tomboy growing up, after all. But now that I realize I can make someone else pick that stuff up for me, that's how I roll.

I'm sure there's a ton more, but I'll just go ahead and quit so the Husband can stop rolling his eyes at me.

Screw the Rabbit.

I've never been crazy for holidays. Now, my old roommate--who was the youngest of three--said she remembered the exact moment that she found out Santa wasn't real, the Easter bunny didn't bring chocolate, and mom plays the tooth fairy, often in a forgotten rush. And she was devastated. I couldn't tell you when I learned or how it affected me. Now that I have kids, I'm on the fence about all these things.

In school, the Daughter is learning about all holidays. Which made it a little hard to explain that no one other than college students and the true Irish celebrate St. Patrick's day. And that Valentine's day around here is simply another day to remind each other how much we love each other, and it doesn't require chocolate or roses or even cards. And don't even get me started on Halloween, I detest that "holiday."

So as far as Santa goes, the Husband and I made a deal. Our kids know that Mommy & Daddy buy their presents. Credit is also given for Grammy & PopPop and Meme, aunts and uncles, and whomever else provides for our family. "Santa" brings one unwrapped present each. Why do we do this? Because we feel like our kids need to know that we work hard for the things we provide, as does everyone else. Presents don't just come from some guy who sleeps all year, works one night, and takes all the credit. (Yet the Husband wonders why I equate him to the mafia...) It instills in our kids that hard work reaps rewards, and we should be grateful for everything we get.They understand the concept, most of the time.

Which brings us to Easter. Now, we aren't all about religion. Briefly, the Husband is Catholic and I am Methodist; yet neither of us practice our religion, by choice. Which means we don't participate in Lent, nor do we really celebrate Easter. Now, I'm not opposed to going to sunrise service. But to be honest, I'd rather not cloak the whole thing in a lie about how some rabbit appears in the night to hide hard boiled eggs and bring cheap chocolate and peeps. (However, should any rabbits or other varmints willing to bring me Godiva or Lindt chocolates, I fully invite them to be left at my doorstep. And no fruit fillings, please.).

I feel like this mainly because the Daughter is at the age where shortly, she will learn that these "stories" are lies. So I'd rather not deal with the whole cover-up. We teach that this is a no-lies household and that you can tell mom and dad anything. And who's to say my children won't be as heartbroken as my old roommate, you know?

Little known facts about the Mama

The Daughter is a very intuitive person. She's the type that notices EVERYTHING. Move the coffee table 2" to the left? She'll move it back. Buy a new shirt? She'll ask how long you've had it and why she hasn't seen it before. Try going a different way to the grocery store? She'll drive you crazy in the back seat asking why we're going this way, and are we going to a new store. So it's no surprise that there's a few things that I do out of the ordinary that just never occurred to me as "different." Lately, since she's been learning to read and write, it's these things she notices as of late. Here's a few:

When writing on lined paper, I write in the middle of the lines. No matter whether it's college ruled or wide ruled. This started sometime in high school, and I don't know why I do it. And if I notice myself writing on the baseline, I move it to the middle of the lines. Strange for a graphic designer, no? She questioned it. And I had no good answer for her.

I usually write in all uppercase letters. Though, in most of my design, I prefer the all-lowercase route. But I often use all-uppercase (as in my blog titles, I recently changed that.) I used to tell the Husband back when I was pregnant that I would teach the Daughter that her name was spelled in all lowercase letters because it looked better that way. He told me to bottle up the crazy and not piss off her teachers.

I love my handwriting and am constantly working on it. Really, if you've seen my handwriting, this should be no surprise to you. In college, everyone wanted to borrow my notes because they are neat. I can't stand messy notes (or anything else, but one battle at a time). But sometimes I change the way I write my G, E, or S. Currently, I'm trying to learn how to write a 9 like it is here. No, I'm not in second grade.

I only like writing in blue pen. I prefer an extra fine rollerball or gel. My favorite pen is a Uniball Vision. But normally, you have to buy the entire color package to get the blue. I'll use red or black, but only after my blue is used up. And yes, I rarely lose pens. Ever. I run them out. And the Daughter knows she's not supposed to use them. Thankfully, she prefers pencils anyways.

I hate cursive. I know it's crazy for a designer to detest a type of face, but I am not a fan of cursive. I used to love it, but I like my uppercase handwriting better. However, often I do write in a cursive-ish handwriting when doing notes. But I hate it. I'll often rewrite a note if I've caught myself writing in this cursive.

Despite loving my all-uppercase handwriting, I always sign my name in all lowercase. My father noticed this back in high school and questioned it. He felt that my name should be the most important on the page, so it should at least have an uppercase first letter. At the time, it was unique, and you know how teenagers are always looking to be unique. I wrote my notes neatly and signed my name in all lowercase letters.

Clearly, I cannot stand messy handwriting. My old roommate had the messiest handwriting EVER. It drove me crazy. But you can't change other people, and it never bothered her. I don't usually let the Husband sign cards or address Christmas cards because his handwriting isn't up to par. And he knows this and lets me be. It's part of our happy marriage agreement. 

So, what does your handwriting say about you?

How I know I'm turning into my mother.

We all get to that point in our life, where you cross over. You know what I mean, you go from "I'll never do/say/be that like my mother did" to "OHMYGOD, did I just do/say that?" It's scary. But fear not, we are all now adults, and we've managed to make it this far based on how our parents raised us.

However, lately, I've been noticing more momisms coming out. Observe:

1. My pantry and freezer are full, but I have "no food in the house". You remember that one, right? I couldn't tell you what I have in there (10 cans of various tomatoes, 6 boxes of cereal, 9 boxes of pasta, 11 jars/cans of pasta sauce, 4 freezer bags full of homemade chicken stock, 2 whole chickens, 13 pork chops.... this could go on) I have some that make me more cranky than others, I'll explain.
2. I freak out when I have 2 pounds or less of butter in my freezer. Okay, my mom never did this one–I actually found out this year that you could freeze butter, and all my prayers were answered, angels sang, babies danced, it was an amazing day. Still, I feel like I can't dive into those 2lbs of butter. I'm not sure why I'll need them, I just do. Hey, you never know when you're going to have to whip up some homemade buttercream. (Trust me, do it once, you'll understand.) 
3. I stress over running out of laundry detergent. Now, I've made my own detergent for almost the past year, so running out really doesn't happen. And I don't know why I freak out about it, but I do. Maybe it's because everyone in my family are messy eaters. Crazy? You tell me. 
4. Chocolate. Whenever I'm in the baking aisle, I always fret over whether I have semi-sweet chocolate chips at home. Not that I use them that often, but hey... you never know. As for how this relates to my mother, you can always tell when she has spent too much time in the line waiting for checkout. Her candy stash grows exponentially.
5. I have less patience for other people's kids. I know, most moms are not able to actually come to terms with saying this. But I don't. And honestly, it's not the kids of people I know. It's the kids that are running wild in WalMart, and their parents aren't even trying to make them stop running. We have friends that have 4 (!) girls, and they take them out in public together from time to time, and they are well-behaved. Yes, sometimes one of them is having a bad day or has a melt-down, but that's just the way it is, and you're allowed melt-down passes. But these kids who are chasing each other and knocking into everyone in an already crowded store? I want to run them over with a shopping cart. No one actually wants to go shopping in WalMart, so add this kind of crap, and I just want to scream.
6. If I am buying something with a coupon or for a reduced price, I expect that coupon/price. Otherwise, I don't want it. I'm an avid coupon clipper. I don't use expired coupons, and I adhere to coupon rules. I plan my food shopping based on sales. When I've visited your godforsaken horrific store because you have Lunchables for $.89 and chicken at $.89/lb, I expect to pay those prices. It's simple, right? So when I purchase 15 Lunchables, but am still putting my groceries on the belt and don't see until you're onto other items that my item is ringing $.10 more, don't eff with me because I want them at the advertised price. It's not my problem that they aren't ringing in right. Or that it takes you forever to change them because you have to do it manually. Don't argue with me, and don't refuse to bag my groceries because it's not my fault. And your smug manager who looks like he's a day over 17 can shove it, because if he gives me attitude again, I'll find someone higher than him to bitch to. Market Basket, anyone?
7. Speaking of MB, I cannot stand it when families shop together and bring all 22 children and can't decide on what brand of sliced pre-packaged meat to buy. It's all the same crap from Oscar Meyer anyways, it just looks different. Couldn't one of these 7 adults you've brought with you stay home with all the kidlets? Seriously, is there a need for all of you to pack in your Toyota Camry with covers on the headrests and go grocery shopping? (And would it kill you to take a shower first? Or sometime this week?)
8. If I pay for a service, I expect that service to be provided. If you offer me a 5-year warranty on a large ticket item, and I require service or replacement, I expect to receive it. I once paid for the extended wear warranty on the first couch set the Husband and I purchased together. It was a custom couch, chair and ottoman with our selected fabrics. Within two years, the legs on the couch broke. The padding on the arm fell through the frame. The fabric was worn well before its time. I can't even tell you how frustrating it was to deal with the warranty company. They sent someone out to "look" at the damage first. And he was like, "Wow. You've had this for two years and you don't have kids?" I've seen couches in nightclubs wear better than that piece of garbage. ONE YEAR later, we replaced the couch, because I couldn't battle with the company any longer. I was offered 50% off another custom couch in the store, but we chose not to go that route, for obvious reasons.
9. I will not stand for people talking down to me because I'm a woman. My mom was a very independent woman. She was a woman working in a man's field, and she spoke up when she needed to. She gave 110%, and in return, she expected her employees to follow through on their promises. You promised that car to be painted by tonight? Better be done. She was a very fair boss, but she didn't take the bullshit. She raised me the same way. I don't talk to people in a way that I wouldn't want to be talked to. (See #6) But don't think that you can speak above me based on the situation we are in. If we're looking at a car, don't assume I'm only interested in how it looks. Don't try to play the white knight when I'm purchasing brake fluid in your auto parts store. I know what I'm doing. And when I've read my manual and it tells me what specific kinds to use or not use, don't tell me you think I'm wrong before you've even asked what make/model I'm buying for. And don't assume that I don't know how to drive because I'm a girl. I'll drive a manual transmission vehicle in 4-inch heels and whoop your ass in front of your boys while I apply lipstick. (Not that I wear lipstick, but I keep it for occasions like this). Just keep me away from granite curbs. =)
10. I say the damndest things. Like "did you hear me tell you no?" or "Do you have a hearing problem or a listening problem?" or "Are you out of your mind?" or how about, "what did your father tell you when you asked him?" or the big one, "Boy, don't make me come over there, I'll wash your mouth out!" (well, my mom didn't say "Boy," because, well, she didn't have one.)

What momisms do you say or remember? 

When one door closes...

Another one should open.

Here's the thing.

Deep breath.

I am now unemployed.

And honestly? I'm not scared.

Exhale.

In a nutshell, the company that I worked for was effected by the economy. Some of you may or may not know, that started taking place last year, when my hours were cut. I freaked. I wasn't sure how we'd make things work around here, as we seem to constantly get ourselves over one hurdle only to find another one staring us in the face. Likely taller, harder, and more severe. Which is why the Husband and I refer to Livin' On A Prayer (from Bon Jovi, for those of you that have just crawled out from under a rock and gone directly to AT&T to purchase a CrackBerry) as "our song." I had the inkling that things were not getting better. Turns out, I was right. For the first time ever, I had to leave my job involuntarily.

Now, of course, I am upset. Who wouldn't be? But, I understand why. I've been told over and over that it was purely economical. And I get that. I honestly feel as though they were my family. It was a real family, we laughed, we fought, ultimately, we all worked together to make great things happen. My direct boss and I have a very interesting relationship. We can finish each other's sentences, we bicker, we just "get" each other. The owner referred to us as the old married couple. And some days, it did feel like I work with the Husband. (Minus the attraction.) So how ironic was it to find out upon leaving, that our own individual security codes (a 4-digit number that you choose to work the alarm) were the same? Crazy, right?

Anywho, let's get to the meat of this. I'm not scared. First, I will be continuing to work with them. And if/when they get more clients and work, I will be back. But, the Husband and I have been working toward a goal. A goal that will keep me home with the kidlets more. One that does not require making the equivalent of one car payment per week for childcare. One that keeps us all in a good mood, and easily accessible. Back when I was graduating college, my goal was that by the time I turned 35, I wanted to run my own business. Here I am, partway into the second anniversary of my 29th birthday, and I am working for me.

You know, the Husband and I aren't "financially stable." We never have been. We're just like most of America right now, where sometimes we struggle to make ends meet. Raising two kids isn't cheap. Owning a home isn't cheap. Maintaining two vehicles isn't cheap. Healthcare isn't cheap. Heck, eating isn't cheap, either. But we're going to make this work.

I still have freelance through two viable sources. I just need to add more to my arsenal. And undoubtedly, I have learned the skills over the past nine years in the industry that make me an asset. I know what my talents are. I know where I lack (PLEASE, don't require me to even operate a calculator). And for that, I'm not scared. I'm excited to get the daughter off the bus. I'm excited to hang out with the Son while he's in a stage of growth where I absolutely adore him. (The teenage years? I'm not really looking forward to that). And the Husband is happy that I will be home more. That he won't have to cook dinner every night. Even if we're splitting a can of peas. (Blech!)

There's some really strange things about the timing of this. First, I made my new website live the day I was laid off. Seriously. It's not done, so I'm not sharing yet. Check back later. Second, the Husband had a "Year Ahead" type questionnaire to hand in for work on that same day. One of his 5 goals he had to list? "Put our family in a better place, so I can fully support my wife in her own entrepreneurial venture." Third, well, there is no third. Except that now I have the time to help my mother in her own shenanigans with Basset Hound Rescue. And that really excites me, because she's becoming a very successful writer, and I'm happy to get to be a part of it.

Don't take this the wrong way, because I know there's a lot of people out there that are devastated to not be working. Trust me, I'll still be working. And if I had nothing to fall back on, I'd be up a creek. With no paddle. In a canoe. With two kids that aren't great swimmers. Yeah. But honestly, I'm being positive. 2010 is still going to be a great year for me. It has to be.

Because if I were to only look at the negative, that would be too easy. Like how I have purchased a Cadillac a month before I was jobless. And how the morning I was making my first trip to the unemployment office, I got a flat tire. And then got there too late, they were booked for the entire day. And on my second trip, getting there before opening, learning that I would not be helped that day either. And that the phone service was worse. And then having the neighbor's oil company accidentally put 84 gallons of heating oil into my tank and expecting me to pay the bill. And coming home to not having a working internet connection, thus rendering any sort of freelance work impossible.

It's all positive. Because ultimately, the Cadillac is cheaper than the Saab. Between repairs and everything else, we're not spending more money than we were. And the Brother-In-Law was able to fix my tire for free. And the oil company? Will get their reduced amount of money when we feel like paying them. But we won't run out of heat! I took on the internet and won. And have turned in two books to their respective clients since. And then, I went to the grocery store and found a bunch of yesterday's meat on clearance and have a week's worth of meals for $25. Because now I can get to the grocery store early.

This is my Rocktober, happening in January (note: check out the badge credit). We're halfway there. Bring on 2010!

The 2009 Review.

I found this over at Jenn's Place, and I thought it was quite appropriate.Though, I have omitted the questions that I didn't have an answer for.

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Photograph a fashion show and a big charity event.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don't usually make resolutions because I stopped keeping them somewhere around 30 years ago. If I made any, I'm pretty sure it was something like "be less of a pain in the ass." And honestly, I am not sure how I fared on that. This was a really tough emotional year for me, so if I didn't keep my resolution, my apologies to all affected.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes, actually. My sister-in-law gave birth shortly after the new year.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
 Yes, as I posted, our cat, Tucker.

5. What countries did you visit? Umm, I read a blog based in the UK, does that count?

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009? Patience. I am really trying to be more patient. But like I said, this has been an emotionally-charged year, and that has affected a lot of things.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Making the move to photography as a side business. Perhaps one day it will grow. 

9. What was your biggest failure?
I'm still not ready to discuss this here. 

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Sort of. It's more that we learned that I have a virus that my body hasn't been able to fight off. We don't know how long I've had it or why, but it has added to the tumultuous year. 

11. What was the best thing you bought?
It would be a toss-up between my camera equipment, the Wii and my new car. 

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
 Right now, the kitten's? There's been some serious behavior issues in our house lately. I am sure in the scope of other people's kids (namely like those you see on SuperNanny), ours aren't that bad, but nonetheless, it's behavior that the Husband and I don't condone. 

14. Where did most of your money go?
The mortgage. And daycare. 

15. What did you really, really, really get excited about?
Buying a new car. Photographing some weddings of some friends. Spending time with the fam. 

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
Boom Boom Pow. 

17. Compared to this time last year are you:

Happier? Sadly, no.

Thinner? Definitely not.

Richer? Slightly. But I don't balance the check book, and that's the key to our marriage.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Laugh. 

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worry.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With family and friends. And it was fantastic. 

21. How did you spend new years?
Hangin' with the fam, playing MarioKart for Wii. 

22. Did you fall in love in 2009?
Yes. With my oven. All over again. 

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Aside from the regulars, we started watching the Listener, which we LOVED. And it didn't air for an entire season. Sadface. 

26. What was the best book you read?
Eclipse. My favorite of the Twilight Series. I read the entire series roughly 4 times last year. 

28. What did you want and get?
 More Freelance work

29. What did you want and not get?
A "piggy bank ride" as the Son calls it. 

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
New Moon, hands down. 

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old did you turn?
I turned 31, and spent it with the family trekking around Boston. It was a great day, even though it was disgustingly hot and humid. And the cupcakes sucked. But it was a great time. 

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A Piggy bank ride? That would have been great. 

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Trying harder. I've been trying to make more of an effort at personal style, and though I know what I like when I see it in a magazine, I have a hard time buying clothes that I truly love past the day I bought them. Not all clothes, but sometimes I wish I could be on "What Not to Wear" so that I could have some initial help. The $5000 would be a nice starter, too. 

34. What kept you sane?
The vineyard and liquor store up the street. 

37. Who did you miss?
All my friends and family in the VA. I only saw one this year, and I met his new girlfriend. And she is amazing, exactly what he needed. I miss them dearly. 

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
That you can't flush an entire roll of toilet paper down the toilet and expect it to not flood the bathroom, subsequently leaking into the basement. 

The holidays are coming, the holidays are coming!

So we're T-minus three days until Santa comes. I'm ready to get on with it. I'm ready to spend Christmas eve with much-loved friends, begin our wrapping extravaganza that night, and tear everything open the following morning. The kidlets are going to be excited, they're getting a Wii. The artsy daughter is getting a creative caddy—I've filled a crafting caddy with all sorts of crayons, pencils, markers, glue, glitter, you name it. The Son is getting a remote control truck just like his daddy's. It's going to be a great day. Daddy already got his gift, a new receiver for the tv. What's Mama gettin?

A Cadillac. Yep. Mama's gettin a Cadillac for Christmas.

Wait, before you question how old I really am, know that Cadillac is really revamping their image. They have some really sharp cars out now. I'll be sporting an SRX. It's the crossover/SUV. It's beautiful. Not the one I wanted, as I wanted the CTS sport model with a 6-speed manual (NOT the CTS-V; it's a great car, but would be roughly $500 more a month for me to drive, between fuel consumption, insurance and payment increase), but the Husband wanted me in an SUV again. Truth be told, we need the room with the kidlets and their respective activities. We need something comfortable to ride in. And a quiet vehicle to travel in. Roomy. This thing has a moonroof that feels like a convertible when open. And despite being a "girls' car," she actually has the boy motor, the 4.6 V8. My favorite part? Navigation. Oh, to not be lost and anxious!

My Saab was an amazing car, but it's time to let her go. With the announcement last week from GM to shut down Saab, it's value plummeted. Even though it's got EVERY option available. She has over 106K miles on her, needs new tires, a full set of brakes and rotors, and the entire rear end needs to be dropped to fix her leak in the axle. Oh, and we're leaking oil from somewhere. So, add that all up, and the necessary repairs are now costing more than half of her value. And in reality, if she breaks next week, we're up a creek. She served us well for three years. Now she'll go to auction.

In honor of bringing home a Cadillac, I must share this oldie-but-goodie. But don't worry, I won't disgrace her with gold plating and all that crap.

It's My Cadillac (Sorry, embedding not allowed on this one.)

I do still think my rendition of "I want a hippopotamus for Christmas" being "Mama's gettin a Cadillac for Christmas....only an SRX in black will do...." is way better. The Husband thought it was funny as I sang it to him last night as he was falling asleep.

Sigh.

So, being all excited about embracing the idea of skinny jeans and tall suede boots, I went to DSW on my lunch break the other day. Because who doesn't like shoe shopping on the fly? Well, the boots I wrote about in my last post were there. And I tried them on. As well as about fifty other pairs of boots. The bad news? Apparently playing sports for all of my life, minus the last eight years, has given me "wide calves." NONE of the boots I liked fit. Not even on bare leg. But I did figure out that Kenneth Cole Reaction Wide Calf styles fit me. Not sure how much skinny jean will fit in there with my calf, but I'll try. And I did find an adorable pair of purple snakeskin-like Steve Madden flats, just like what I've been looking for. (Only better, they're way cute. And a little more $$$ than I would like to spend, but perhaps there will be coupons in my future?)

Shopping for shoes is supposed to be easy. Shoes = happiness, right?

My holiday wish list.

I've been a relatively good Mama this year. It's been a rough year for all of us. But just in case you're wondering, here's my list:

A new pretty magenta scarf.This one is from Old Navy (linky) and is only $7. It's soft cotton acrylic—I don't like wool scarves—and pretty. I did see one a few months ago at the Calvin Klein outlet in Wrentham, but it was much longer. (And only $30—usually on sale, too). The longer one sorta scares me, since both of my winter coats are knee-length, I'm worried with a long coat and a long scarf that I'll end up looking like a tiny girl dressed in oversized clothing. Especially since one of the coats is a down slim-styled puffer. (I swear, it's slimmer, I promise). I'm just too cold up here in New England to go another winter without one. But I love the brightness of this magenta. I'm not at all a pink girl, but I tried on the teal and the bright purple—both which were nice, too—but this one actually looked best on my skin. I'd really love to find a matching crocheted skull cap too.

The Calphalon Dutch Oven.

I know, I look at this thing every year. And previously, I wanted this exact one, the 8-quart oval, because not only would it make great soups with me, but it could cook corn. But then, we tried corn cooked on the grill. And I don't think I can ever go back to boiled corn. EVER. Seriously, if you haven't tried it, you should. You'll never look back. I do love the versatility of a dutch oven. I've been into making soups lately, and I think it would be a great addition to the kitchen. But I would like one that's at least 5-quarts. I'd like a round one. And honestly, I'd be fine with one from Marshall's, it doesn't have to be Calphalon. I just think I'm ready for a cast iron dutch oven. However, I would like to replace my pots with Calphalon pots, as the Husband pointed out. In due time...

Alright, the next one, I'm giving in. I'm scared, but I'm going to embrace it.

I'm ready to try the trend: Tall suede boots and skinny jeans. I love the ruffle on the side of these, it's feminine but still cool. And these are only $79 at DSW, not bad! I think a flat boot would be better for me, as I'll likely wear it more. And hopefully be less clumsy. However, I think I actually want a gray pair. Like this pair:

 

These are the Steve Madden ones and are on sale for $49 at Finish Line. I am somewhat worried about them looking a little too Robin Hood, but I think being in gray will help. I used to have a pair like these when I was a little girl, when suede boots made their debut in the 80s. Mine were a bit lower, though. Of course, I'd love the top boots in gray, that would be my ultimate. Anyhow, I think these paired with some Stella Skinny Leg Jeans from Express. I think Express would be my best bet at skinny jeans looking good on me, since I'm not, well, skinny. Of course, I'm not really sure what I'd wear on top, I'll have to ask my fashion guru, The Missus.

This one's more of an upcoming necessity:

The Crumpler 7 Million Dollar Home. I need a larger bag for my camera equipment. I also like the 8 million and the Brazillion, but this one fits my budget a little better. However, I'll likely buy it off ebay anyhow. I love Crumpler bags, I have the 4 million, and it's great for days out with the fam, but I can't carry lenses and a flash. Or anything else. And I need to be able to. I found another bag that I could use with my current one, but I think one bag for everything would work. And if I'm doing events, where you don't really get to set your gear down, a messenger works better, since some of these events are semi-formal and formal. It's easier to access on the fly, too. I also like that these bags don't generally look like camera bags, they're much more stylish.

Alright, that's pretty much it. Unless Santa is going to bring me a new sleigh in place of Katarina, but that's saved for another post. What's on your list?

Reason #732 why I dislike shopping with the kidlets...

It was time for some new underoos. The Husband has decided instead of waiting, he's taking the Son and they're going to hang out at Best Buy. I've got Daughter duty to shop. Which doesn't sound so bad, right?

We're at the mall in the underoo store, and I'm picking out my dressing room pile. The first fun thing that happens, is she grabs a red "nightgown" off the rack and says, "this is pretty mommy, you could put this on later when we have friends coming over!" She's incredibly proud of herself because she knows I love red, and yes, some friends whom I've taken their wedding photos are coming over later to review them. I tell her that it's not clothing appropriate for other people to see. She's a little confused, but she hangs it back up and moves on.

Later, we're in the main room with more practical underoos. She's all excited because she notices the size letters on the drawers. I show her which one I'm looking for. Now, I'm not a "big" girl, but I'm no size zero. She holds up a pair out of my drawer and says, "wow, mom, those are bigggg!" Great, so I've just been given a complex by my 6-year-old, thin-as-a-rail daughter. And I want to stuff a sock in her mouth. Of course, immediately following, there is the inhale of other women awaiting my reply. I tell her, "that is not nice at all, and you need to stop." She cowers. We move on. I continue, but she's over looking at some underwear that's hanging on the wall. She turns around, across the room, and says, "Mommy, these should fit you, they're big!"

Makes you want to take them everywhere, eh?

It's all the little things...

I read in some magazine years ago about relationship advice that in order to maintain a healthy relationship, you need to let go of the three top pet peeves—the little things that drive you crazy. And honestly, it's great advice, albeit easier said than done. My pet peeves seem to not apply to me. I can't stand messiness, but would rather not pick up after myself all the time. I CAN'T operate with a messy desk. CAN'T. And right now, my desk at home is a disaster. Granted, my dead iMac sits on top and I don't sit at it right now, but if I did, I'd have to clean it before I could get anything done. I hate little repetitive noises. I've always had an amazing sense of hearing. Now that my eyesight is not what it used to be, my hearing has strangely gotten more keen. I have a hard time filtering out things. Well, the fact that I'm nosy doesn't help.

There's this loose bolt caught under my driver's seat in the metal base. It comes and goes, but it seems to become active when I'm upset or pissed off. I'll be all upset about something in traffic or whatever, and I hear this little bolt rolling around. My first thought is usually, "that stupid effing bolt!" The Husband won't fish it out because it requires unplugging a bunch of stuff that will have to be reset at the dealership, and I'm fresh out of warranty.

In the two-plus years' relationship I've had with Katarina (my car), I've tried to let go of the peeves. But some days, she makes it really hard. I've put a crapload of miles on her, and she needs an entire new set of brakes, among other work, but all in all, I'm still on the fence as to what to do with her.

But every time I hear that stupid little bolt, I want to scream. And stomp my feet. Even if I'm trying to let go.

Oh Dear, I'm afraid Fall has passed me right by!

Okay, so life has been at a running pace lately, and I'm just trying to keep up. There's so much goin' on 'round these parts, I don't even know where to begin. So how 'bout some pics?

First, Fall came:

This was the first image I took with my Series E 50mm lens. It's a manual focus lens, I love old school stuff. My old SLR was a fully manual camera, oh how I miss it. I sold it to finance my DSLR, and there's not a day that goes by when I'm out shooting that I don't miss it. DSLRs just have so many options, and I don't know how to change them all. Crazy, I know. But I knew my old machine inside and out. And I shot infrared, which I miss dearly. I can do a conversion, but it's pricey. I may look into it, that was really my niche. Anywho, this photo wicked grainy, but I love it. It may end up being a Christmas present for someone. We'll see.

I had my first ever week-off vacation. Only it wasn't really a vacation. It was an insanely busy week, which should be no surprise. First, Columbus day, the Daughter was in a parade. Here's her with two other girls on her Cheerleading team.

Yes, she has her tongue out. And being the great photographer mother I am, I didn't get any good photos of the actual float, because I was too busy looking for her on it. (Hey, they all look the same in their uniforms!) Anyway, they won "Most Beautiful in Parade" I cried, of course.

That Friday, the Daughter turned 6. I can't believe it either. I made my first cake with fondant icing. In an insanely annoying pink. (Hey, the coloring stickers were WAYYYY lighter, so this was a bit unexpected, but she loved it just the same.)

What, you didn't get your name written in Helvetica on your birthday cakes? Well, I guess that's the upside to your baker being a graphic designer. She was very excited about it. Although, I did flavor the icing with an orange flavor, and I didn't care for that, but homemade fondant is awesome. It's pretty good and so much cheaper.

For the next day, the party, I did a cupcake tower. The kids were so excited! The Daughter didn't see the cupcakes until right when I had them on the tower, she was delighted. The kids couldn't wait to devour them. And those, were GOOD. Had I not caught my nephew eating three of them, I'd probably have one left. But I had none. Seriously.

I fabricated the stand out of a ginormous box my mother sent birthday gifts in. Approximately 14.2 minutes before people started showing up at my house. So I didn't get to cover the risers in foil. Oh well, it looked great and the kids were excited. The Husband had to work that day, so yes, I had something like 18 kids and their entire families in the downstairs of my small half-duplex. I was okay until the neighbor's kids came uninvited and began yelling at my Daughter on the steps. Yes, I kicked her out. Ugh.

Then came Halloween. Let me preface this. I hate Halloween.  This holiday could just go away, and I'd be thrilled. First of all, there's no real cheap way to get out of Halloween. My kids aren't really into being "characters," so it's up to me. I waited, hoping it would be terrible weather so we could just have a movie night at home. But that wasn't the case, so the day before, we went to iparty. The Daughter picked out an "Asian Princess" costume. She called herself a Karate Princess. I was better with that, since the Husband thought she was a "Geisha" (read: escort). Whatever. It was cute. The Son wanted to be Superman. And there were no Superman costumes to be found. So I whipped out the Threadbanger.

So I found the Superman logo online and printed it out, cut it out of red and then again in yellow and sewed it all together. Then I made the cape. I also made a mask that he's wearing. And I then printed the logo out on some screen-print iron-on paper. Only, then, he had only one clean blue shirts, so I turned one inside out and ironed on the chest logo. He was so excited.

In the end, it wasn't that bad, they got us some good candy and they wore out around 7:30. Then we had to visit the fam and all that stuff. So it was a tiring Halloween. Though, I'd be super happy for Halloween to be on a Saturday forever.

Moving on to November, I was able to photograph the Joey Fund Film Premiere. My work had a small part in the event, we did all the banners and posters. We also do the tshirts and the bags every year, so it was quite nice to see everything come together at the event. Here's my favorite shot:

I love the Bokeh. We didn't do the table tents, but we did do the logo on them. =)

So, that's been my past few months. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Daughter who has had a 102 fever for two days and I need to get to the grocery store to purchase the Thanksgiving Day shenanigans. And yes, T-Day is two days away. And I've decided to do everything homemade, from the stuffing to the gravy to the green beans with toasted almonds. Even though I reallllllly love Stove top stuffing. Oh well. I'm most excited about the homemade cranberry sauce and the pumpkin cheesecake. So I need to get on with roasting my sugar pumpkins so I can create this divine masterpiece that calls for four (yes, 4!) bricks of cream cheese.

Alright, until next time!

Things I love Thursday

There's a few items that I've come across that I absolutely love. Care to hear what they are? No? Too bad.

Vinegar. I know, I'm always raving about this stuff. But seriously, what other item can get my laundry clean, make my floors sparkle, and make my soup and pasta dishes "pop"? Exactly.

My kitchenaid mixer. I love this thing, and I know that you know that. I'm not the naming type and find it a bit strange when some people ask me what her name is. She doesn't have one. But she is getting flames painted on her soon! (Thanks to the cousin) Anywho, not only does this mix like a champ, but it makes ice cream, shreds anything except paper, and hopefully soon will roll out pasta. It's the ice cream part that excites me the most, but you knew that, too.


Coco Willy shampoo and conditioner. I haven't found this stuff in about fifteen years. My mom and I used to use it, and then it disappeared for a couple of years. When we came across it in a grocery store, we bought all the bottles on the shelf. (Yes, we asked if they had any in the back, too.) I don't like coconut, but this stuff was awesome. Should you find any, you MUST send it. I'll bake you a pie. But I can't promise what the postal service will do to it.

Palmer's lotions. In a past life, I was a bartender. A bartender that constantly had her hands in dishsoap and sanitizer, because we were perpetually running out of glasses. And it killed my skin, especially in the winter. Then I found Palmer's cocoabutter. And I love it, but recently, I found the olive butter lotion made from olive oil. It's great in the kitchen for a day of baking, but it doesn't leave you oily at all. And none of them smell like most cocoabutter lotions, I promise.


Yankee Candle Clean Linen Scent anything. One of my favorite scents is clean linen. (Yet I hate doing laundry... I don't get it). Matter of fact, I make my own detergent and had to finally scent it because the strange smell of the soap base was making me cringe. I don't like most of the food-smell candles, it just gets to be too much. But I never get tired of the clean linen scent. I've also recently found honeysuckle, and recall loving that scent as a kid. And as a side note, why can you not get the Wedding Day candle at the store? Wouldn't that be the right place for it? Yeesh.

White Sheets. I don't know what it is, but there is nothing like climbing into a bed with white sheets. It's too bad that I only have one complete set of white sheets. Sheets are just one of those things I never buy for myself.


Purple or blue mascara, currently L'oreal HIP blue. It's not overtly Madonna-blue, but it's enough that when I wear it, people notice my eyes. And I have very blue eyes. Not like the daughter's blue eyes, but more of a steel-gray-blue. This stuff has great color, but it tends to wear down during the day and I notice my face wears it after a few hours. I haven't found another blue one that I like, but of course, I'm too cheap to go to Sephora. I do keep getting coupons for Ulta, perhaps I should check them out.

Alright, this is all I can put together right now. I'm sure I will come up with all sorts of additions while I'm on my way to work tomorrow, but then I'll forget them again.

Recovering from September.

September has been a crazy busy month for us. Everything has come up, from the first day of school ever (well, she went to preschool, but still), cheerleading, swimming lessons, mental preparation for a breakdown at swimming lessons, family birthday parties, and beginning holiday planning, to the weekend where we had two weddings, one Red Sox game, one Fashion Show and two friends visiting from out of town. I still feel like I need recovery, since I've also been stuck in laundry hell for the past two weeks.

Fall is my favorite season, it's like spring with less rain. And I have learned in the three (!) years we've lived in Massachusetts, there is no fall like a New England fall. The colors are beautiful, the apples are, well... available. I'm not a huge apple fan, but suddenly I have more apples than I know what to do with. I've even made my first pass at canning this past month. It was a little messy, and I learned that when the instructions say leave 1" at the top, they mean it. Oh well, what can you do? I guess I'll be safe in that the cans of pie filling that I made will be stuck to the shelf they're on and won't fall off at least. It's something I will definitely be doing in the future, when I find the time.

Summer and fall are also my busiest times with freelance work. The company I do a bulk of my freelance for is a book publisher, and there's always the fiscal year push followed by the end-of-year push. It's nice, but combined with all the other things already on the schedule, I'd really just like to clone myself.

What else has gone on? Well, to start with, right when we fired up the deep freezer for the winter and loaded it, the condenser died. And subsequently leaked two gallons of homemade chicken stock all over the basement floor. For four days. Oh, and there were three whole chickens in there that I got on a really good sale. Figures, right? Then, the receiver for the television died it's slow and painful death. And now the plasma tv is on the fritz and the Husband is about to have a fit. (I swear, I have nothing to do with this. Other than it lives in my house, and you know how we've discussed how electronics run screaming from me.) And now we have a resident skunk living somewhere in the vicinity of our shed, which is located roughly 20 feet from our back door. And is smelly.

Anywho, fall is still a favorite time for me, despite its busy-ness. There's the return to the kitchen, which I really never left since we got gipped on summer. But I'll be trying my hand at homemade pasta—butternut squash ravioli to be exact. We'll have that with a smoked gouda sauce. I can't wait. And I'll be pulling out my famous fall recipes (because I like to pretend I'm up there with Alton Brown and Paula Deen), from stuffed chicken to shepherd's pie to yummy desserts. And probably a meatloaf for the Husband. Because I like to keep him happy since he cooks most nights of the week.

And looking ahead, we have the Daughter's sixth birthday in two weeks, she's decided out of her choices, she wants to go to Michael's Arts & Crafts for a party. Yay! And another family member is getting married, I'll be photographing that wedding, too. And then there's the fundraisers for cheerleading and school, get-togethers with friends, work, and soon upon us will be the holidays. I'm already tired thinking about it. Wonder if I could hire someone to come in and do my laundry and dishes? Anyone work for freshly baked apple pies? Anyone? Bueller?

The Birthday Wardrobe.

So I decided that for my birthday, I was taking my earnings shopping for some much-needed new clothes. I did buy a lot, but I promise you, I really did not spend a lot. I bought everything on sale and had coupons that made it silly cheap. But I'll stress, I needed some new threads. My closet is really starting to show its age/quality. I did buy some stuff at H&M and Forever 12 over the past year with the intention that the quality really isn't the best, but it's what I can afford for now. Without further ado, I give you, my purchases:

 

Okay, not exciting, but I seriously needed some simple dress tops. From left, the first is a white and blue striped top, the middle is a white with a blue box stripe, and the right is a white top with a texture to it. Simple enough to go with so much. You'll see what all I bought them to go with. Next:

The left top is one of the short sleeved tops on sale at Express this week for $19. I bought one in black and one in a plum color. I also have a royal blue one. The next is a blue sweater. I bought it specifically to go over the tops above. The right is a blue knit top with flowers on it. I should mention I also bought a blue and a black fabric flower for embellishment. Cute, eh? Now here's the real deals, the tops I bought at NY & Co, the one on the right here and the three above, I purchased as part of the buy-one-get-one 1/2 off sale. And I had City Bucks, so alltogether, I paid $50. Yes, $50. The Express tops, I had coupons with, so I paid $10 per top. It gets better. Just wait.

Then, I did some layering pieces: 

The first on the left is actually a bright pink ribbed sweater shell. I wasn't going to wear it solo, as pictured, but over some of my tops, namely the black one above. The next is a double breasted vest. I've been debating buying one of these for over a year, and finally I bought this one. Honestly, I liked the gray one better, but haven't been able to find it in my size. This one is more brown, but I am happy with it. The next is a sweater vest/cardigan. I actually bought this in gray, and it's close to this one, but I couldn't find the one I actually bought.  The sweater and the vest on the left were both bought with coupons, the sweater was part of the bogo, and the vest was used with a 20% off coupon. The cardigan was purchased at Forever 12 (as I like to call it), so it was only $13. Although, now that I see it in red, I may have to get it. More:

Alright, I need your imaginations here. The left, obviously a shirt dress. I actually bought a black one with 3/4 sleeves. But I couldn't find it. The right is a high-waisted skirt that I bought in black, not this ridiculous coffee-bean pattern. It's not actually high-waisted, but it does carry that look. I hate high-waisted anything, and despite the fact that this skirt does have pleating, it looks really cute on. The dress was on sale for $35 and I had a 20% off coupon. The skirt was 60% off and was bought with the 20% off coupon. So the dress came to something like $28 and the skirt was... under $9. Who can pass these deals up? 

Here's the stuff I couldn't find anything remotely close to photograph. I bought (to go under the gray sweater vest) a yellow ruffled top from Forever 12. Yes, yellow. Before you send the fashion police, know this. It's a light top, with a texture in the fabric. The ruffle lays flat and is actually quite flattering. I'm going to wear it in yellow as long as I retain my summer "color" on my face. Then I'm going to dye it red, because I think red suits my skin tone better than yellow. This way, if it comes out more orangey, it will still be a hue that I can wear. I also bought two knit v-neck tops (my signature top) from Express. One in white, because most people I know are still on the quest for their perfect white tee, and one in plum, because, well, I have a hard time passing up plum. Exp is having a buy-one-get-one free on knit tops, and I had a 15% off coupon, so this ended up being $17 for the two shirts. I adore Express and the way their clothes fit my body, regardless of my body shape, I feel good in the clothes. All my jeans and dress pants are Express as well.I did also buy a black chino pencil skirt from Old Navy. It's a much more casual skirt, but nice with flats for fall. 

Now I have to say, Forever 12 is just a daunting store. I hate shopping in there, but honestly, some of their stuff can be cute and is ridiculously cheap. I like that because if I'm not sure how much I'll like something that's cute, but out of my comfort zone, I don't have a problem paying $15 for a top that I only wear a few times. Rest assured, I don't go near their bottoms or dresses, because lord knows I am not shaped like a stick. I think it's all in how you wear something, and I've gotten lots of compliments on some of the items I've bought from there. Of course, rifling through their website and sorting tops that are labeled "dressy," I understand now why so many teenagers look so trampy when they are out with their friends. Someone needs to pare down the designers at that place, they are just out of control. 

I am so excited for my new clothes! The husband is quite happy that I really didn't spend as much as he thought I did, but that's smart shopping. I'd feel terrible if I spent that kind of money on only a portion of the clothing, because I would start to wonder whether I should put that money to use elsewhere. But no doubt, I got a great deal on all my stuff. And I know what you're thinking, that's an awful lot of blue hues, but honestly, I know what I look good in. And this way, I can mix and match more of my stuff. And honestly, some of the yellowish/green tones out this fall do not at all complement my skin. But this royal blue color carries through nearly every season and blues are my best colors. I still carry my red purse (the blue Michael Kors one I purchased is on sale at ebay, I just couldn't do such a big, slouchy bag everyday), so that's another splash of color. Also, I've upgraded a lot of my jewelry and accessories, thanks to a friend who works at a company that makes them. (F-R-E-E!!!). I feel much better about my style (the fact that I have a style, not just covet one) and who doesn't like to feel and look good?

In true me fashion, there are still a few things I am watching and hoping go on sale, you ask? This: 

it's a wool herringbone coat. And this photo doesn't do it justice. It was lust at first sight. I have a few coupons, so if they have a good outerwear sale, I am on it! Well, we'll see. I do need some photography equipment for an upcoming wedding I'm shooting. But I'm going to watch it and drool.

What are you buying this season?

Our trip to Boston

Yesterday, in celebration of my birthday, the Husband and I took the kids into Boston. The plan was, ride the train in, ride the swan boats, and stop at a cupcake shop for cupcakes. So upon searching and mapping out our day, we were all set. We ride in on the commuter rail, which the kidlets were overly thrilled about. Where we live we can hear the train when it passes, and so they were ridiculously excited to finally get to ride one. The only down side was that the windows were so dirty on the outside that you couldn't see out of them. And the kids reminded us of this every ten minutes or so. It was a hard day, I'm not going to lie. It was in the 90s and sickeningly muggy. Also, we're not used to that much walking. Boston is a walking city, if you're not familiar. The Husband and I spent two nights in Boston before we actually lived up here, so we had some sort of a grip on things. If you're looking for a good city guide, the Not For Tourists guides are the best way to go. More on this one later. The day starts out, we get off at the wrong rail station (Ruggles) and end up hiking for like six miles to get to the Common. If you don't know me, I get really anxious when I'm lost. Which is also why the Husband and I have decided that our next vehicle will be equipped with Navigation. Anywho, after what seems like forever, we get to the common. Not without stopping at the Pru to visit the skywalk. Well, until we get to the top and discover it's going to be $40 to see a hazy view of the city. I'm sorry, but we're on a budget. We stop at Maggiano's to eat lunch. Not where we really wanted to stop, but at that point, we were STARVING and needed some nosh. Surprisingly, it cost us less than what the skywalk would have cost, and that was some Good Eats. I had half a spinach salad, the Husband ate half an order of linguine with red clam sauce, the Son had mac & cheese, the Daughter had her favorite, naked pasta with butter. It was one of the best meals we've had in a LONG time. We venture over to the Common, and the kids have a good time. I'm amazed at the wildlife and how accustomed the animals are to being close to people. This one little squirrel just stood close to us looking at it like "what? You've never seen a squirrel before?" It was really fun. We rode the swan boats, and as fun as it sounds, it was also disgustingly hot and muggy. I know I've said this before, but I just can't explain to you how gross it was. Strangely, the kids hung really well. Even the daughter had on flip flops (like me) and still did really well walking all over. When we were done, I had decided I wanted to indulge in my cupcakes. We exit the Common and start to regroup, when we learn we have somehow now lost our NFT guide. So imagine our situation, where even with the guide, we've walked for two hours around the city, lost. And now we have no guide, but an address and two cross streets. So we carry on. We've passed like five bookstores, so I figure if we walk up Newbury Street, we'll find another, we can just pop in and buy another guide, right? Yeah. Well, Urban Outfitters and Marc Jacobs don't care to tell you how to get around the city. So we walk the fourteen blocks to Mass Ave, we're hot, sticky, tired of walking, and want to just go home. But we press on to eat cupcakes at Sweet. Not to be confused with Sweet of Worcester. The kids are excited, the cupcakes are adorable, we pick out four regular cupcakes and one mini. And it's $14.75. Holy $hit, batman! That's almost half of what we spent on lunch! Now I've done my research. I love me some cupcakes. I've perfected a few recipes of my own. But I'll gladly buy yours if they're good. Sweet in Boston comes highly recommended. I gotta be honest, I really didn't like the cupcakes at Sweet. They really sucked. I had a mini of the Dark Chocolate with vanilla buttercream. It was... mehh. I had a regular size cappuccino cupcake. It really wasn't great. The cakes seemed very dry, and the frosting wasn't anything great. It was almost like pre-packaged, overly-flavored buttercream. The Husband had a Dark chocolate with chocolate icing, the son had the bubblegum, and the daughter had the pink lemonade. No one could finish their cupcakes. And the Husband and I were quite disgusted at the fact that none of us even wanted to finish them, but we paid almost $15 for them. As soon as we left, the Husband looks at me and says, "Your cupcakes are far better than those." He knew I was upset because I hate spending money on something I don't like. Now, I would have loved to be able to make the trek to KickAss Cupcakes, mostly because they serve fried cupcakes, and I have a hard time thinking of something better than that. If you're in the Worcester area, that Sweet is FANTASTIC. We compared on the way home, as that shop has the giant cupcakes, and I am pretty sure they were even cheaper than what we just had. I highly recommend them. So we got home, dead tired, gave the kids baths and decided to finish painting spots in the house that needed touch up. I'm not really sure why, but that's what we did. And I'll be making my own cupcakes that we'll eat with tomorrow for my real birthday. I feel the need to put cream cheese on top of something. If you'd like to see the photos I took yesterday, visit my photostream on flickr. I'll be uploading the daughter's photos later, as I let her carry my small camera.

Apparently, I'm in love with Jessica Simpson.

I'm not really sure how it happened, either. Okay, let me explain. It's been a terrible week for me. There have actually been some good parts, but it's the crap that I recall the most. First, my car rolled over 100,000 miles. I know, doesn't sound drastic, but I had a Certified Saab, which is covered for 100,000 miles. So my warranty is up. And my axle is leaking now. Of course. The next day, I broke my favorite wine glass. I have one left, but really, what good is one wine glass? They are crystal, and I bought them as a 21st birthday gift to myself. Strange that they lasted me almost exactly ten years? Oh well, what can you do? Thursday, I drove the Husband's truck to work. Upon jumping out of the driver's seat, I broke the heel to my red shoes. Truth be told, I only liked that they were red. I think they were a little dowdy, but they were the right price at the right time. More than a year ago. So I had to go out on lunch and buy a new pair of shoes. Enter a pair of adorable Jessica Simpson booties. I couldn't find a photo, and I don't feel like dragging out the camera, as my ass has made a perfect indentation in the couch. Now, I don't usually give a second glance, but they were really cute. They're a beautiful black leather, and really, she loves Louboutins, so they can't be that bad, right? They're actually built much like Louboutins, where the platform is hidden inside the shoe, so the heel isn't so ridiculous. Because as much as I love a 4" heel, those who know me know that my gracefulness usually shows through at the perfect time. It's this reason that I have sworn I will no longer buy cuffed dress pants. Anywho, I'm at DSW, and these shoes are on the sale rack. I had to do the math three times to make sure I didn't screw up, these shoes ended up being $21.00. Seriously. Actually, it looks like there's something (paint?) on the inside of one of the heels, but I have some black shoe polish that I am sure will take care of business. If not, I have tons of Sharpies. But let's be honest, I am going to kill these shoes sooner or later, so why not buy them with a flaw? Then I won't be so upset the first time I trip over a curb. You should have seen me, though, I was all "hide them so no one else will take the box while I'm still shopping." I ended up going back on Friday to purchase a pair of Nine West 3" black heels, a staple I've sorely been missing in my wardrobe. I digress. Let's back up to Wednesday. I shuffle the kidlets out of the house and am herding them into the car. My sunglasses are on my head, and I go to buckle the son in. And whack my head on the door frame. And crack my glasses. My Oakley XS Fives (yes, they are kids, stop laughing) that I've had for six years. I've always bought Oakleys since I was in high school. They always had a smaller face frame that fits me well. Because honestly, I have a narrow head and really can wear kids glasses. And I've gotten used to their brown iridium lens. Tear. Actually, it hurt really bad. So today, I stopped at the Outlets to check out the Oakley Vault. And to stop by the Vans Outlet to get the son a new pair of kicks—only to find they were closed. Sigh. I found a pair of Oakleys I liked, but not a pair that I love. I'm picky, I like tortoiseshell glasses, as I think black frames are too severe for my skin tone. And the styles out right now for women don't ususally fit on my face. I look like I'm trying to fit in my mother's oversized glasses playing dress up. Or I look like a fly. We leave and head to the mall. I park at Macy's, and we walk in to accessories and Coach. I peel myself away from drooling on the new Parker bag and peruse the sunglasses, not expecting to find much. And in the end, I fell in lust with these: They are adorable, no? A pair of slightly rounded, narrow-fitting Jessica Simpson sunglasses with brown lenses. It was love at first sight. But I didn't buy them. Yet. They weren't on sale, they were $45. EVERY other pair was, except the JS ones. Of course. So I asked the lady in the Coach section (I was told they were the only saleswomen who could help) if by chance she had a coupon I could use. She turned on the attitude and was all, "Uh, no. We mail those out to our PREFERRED customers." I felt like I was suddenly at a Mercedes dealership asking if they could cut me a deal on an AMG, cause I'm on a budget. WTF??? My mother shops at Macy's quite often. Her favorite thing to do is go home and add up what her purchases should have cost her, since she uses specialty coupons and apparently holds the cashier hostage until she's paid only $23.47 for approximately $679.65 worth of accoutrements. Usually, if they have a coupon out, they will just scan one for you. Normally, I make sure I'm near an old lady while I'm asking because you know they have like six extras and will lend you one. Instead, here I stand, facing Cruella. She simply places them on the counter in front of me like she's teasing, leans against the back of the opposite counter, looks at me and says, "well, you can open a Macy's account, you'll get 15% off, and make payments on these glasses. I resist the urge to choke her. I don't want to make payments, I want 30% off, like every single other pair! I look up and realize that my children have tried on every Sunday's best hat and have left them on the floor, and are running around with berets on their heads. I look straight at her and say, "Daughter, Son, let's go, we're going home!" Because it would be a shame to pinch this woman's head off and risk getting that beautiful white leather bag dirty behind her. Incase you're in shock, I'm not the type that leaves my kids' mess behind. Matter of fact, when we go out to eat, the Husband tries to remind me that I am no longer a waitress and need to stop stacking, scraping, and aligning all the table items for easy pick-up. But this woman is lucky I didn't strangle her with a removable shoulder strap.

The Photographic Mama, better explained...

Some of you may or may not know, this past Christmas, the Husband gave me a Nikon D60, my first Digital Single Lens Reflex Camera. The rest of the story is that I sold my traditional (read: 35 mm film) SLR on ebay to further finance a DSLR. One of my goals when we moved up here was to get back into photography and shoot more often. After all, I minored in photography in college. Now, I'm trying to remind myself to take my camera with me everywhere. That's always been my biggest problem. Life happens, and I don't have my camera to chronicle it. Now, I was hopping around the blogosphere and found MCP Actions, specifically the post of which I swiped borrowed this: And this is exactly how I feel every time someone makes this comment. Like MCP and many of the bloggers that commented, a camera is solely a tool. Yes, there are people out there that can simply snap great images. But it takes talent to consistently create amazing images using composition. Is it easier to achieve Bokeh? Yes. Can a better sensor pick up more detail? Yes. Does that make everyone with a DSLR a photographer? No. Anyone can shoot in Auto mode. To quote one commenter, "Did people admire Julia Child for her oven?" No. Hey, I own a ton of pencils and paint, but that doesn't make me a fine artist. Matter of fact, Daddy would be so proud if he knew that the caliper he gave me makes me an Engineer. Are you with me? When I used to shoot with film, I worked with infrared film. I preferred Black and White infrared because I could develop and handle it, as working with color infrared meant I would have to send it out for other people to do my finish work. And that is precisely why I no longer shoot BW infrared—the lack of access to a darkroom requires I send out my film. That, and the fact that infrared film is $$$. Anywho, the camera I used was a Nikon FM10. The most basic, fully-manual SLR. To answer why, I once shot a wedding, and the uncle with his "Mac Daddy" Canon came over and asked me what I use. He made snide comments about my camera, to which I told him, "My camera can do anything that yours can. The difference is that mine doesn't have an auto setting." I still don't think he understood. Part of being a professional at anything is fully understanding what you are doing and how to use all your tools. I own plenty of wrenches, and while I have more understanding of vehicles than most women, there's a reason you don't find me fixing them. (Hint: read my last post). So to sum this all up, it's not the camera that takes great images. And yes, I want to wring a neck every time I hear how my camera takes great photos. I have, after all, won awards for photography.